Monday, March 28, 2011

I am humbled

I am pleasantly surprised by the fact that I still have readers. Thank you! I will try to keep posting, but I am bad at it.
I have my 20 week anatomy scan on Apr 12th and am scared to death they are going to tell me that my little girl is now a boy. I know the lady that did my scan was 100% sure and I could even tell it was a girl, but I still have this gut feeling that my dream isn't going to come true.
We have fallen in love with our little girl. we have named her (although I am not announcing it on the internet, just in case we decide to change it-I doubt it though since I have already ordered 2 personalized items with her name on it). I will be devastated because although I will love another boy, I have gotten used to the idea that my little miracle is a girl. I will keep you all updated in two weeks on that note.
On another note, I am in New Orleans (pronounce N'awlans) this week. Shaun had a medical conference and since I needed to be off work anyway, I thought I would tag along. It is a great little city. I just wish my belly thought so too. Two meals, and twice my belly has not agreed with it. I am hoping it will pass since the food is good. Shaun pretty much gets after 5pm off, so Oliver and I do a few things then we all go out in the evening. The weather is great. High 70's, low 80's and a slight breeze. A little humidity, but not much compared to what I am used to. Makes me more excited to go on our cruise in a month. Caribbean weather will be warmer and ready for beach and swimming. I brought my suit, but they have an outdoor pool. Mom never let us swim unless it was 80 degrees or warmer and now, I understand. 80 really isn't that warm...when you talk about swimming in the pool. I might take Oliver down to the pool anyway, just to see if it is warm water.
Sorry, rambling. Next up...trip home. I have been dying to go home. I haven't been home since Sept, and I miss my family and friends terribly. When I was home in Sept, I didn't really reach out to my friends 9except my best friend, Suzy) because I had just gone through a miscarriage, and I guess I just didn't feel up to it. I didn't realize it at the time, but looking back I am guessing that is why. Needless to say, I need my friends. I am hoping to go home before Baby M#2 arrives, but I just am not sure when I will be able to make the trip. It is super expendy and living in Maryland sucks the life and money out of you! I so cannot wait to be done.
That is all for now!

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Baby Mierzwa #2 on the way...

Hello All,
I am not even sure that I still have readers. That is fine. I just want to put this somewhere, so that I can get it out. We have had quite a crazy year of getting pregnant, then losing it. In May I got pregnant, but then about a week later found out it was gone. It was hard, but I realized it was so early that I am sure that my body was taking care of things. We moved on. In July, we found out we were pregnant again and elated the kids would be about 21 months ideal. Well, we went for our 8 week ultrasound only to find the baby never grew, it was just a sac. So I needed to have a D&C, that was Aug 30th. It took me a few months to heal-both emotionally and physically. My body needed time to heal and get ready, cuz in December we found out we are expecting, yet again. This time, I am reluctant to be happy. At least until I know there is a heartbeat. Well, in January we got our wish and we had a heartbeat. Now, I am excited. Wishing, wondering, hoping. Well I am now 16 and a half weeks along and baby is perfectly healthy so far with a strong heartbeat. I even bought a Doppler so I can listen to the heartbeat anytime that I want. And I do, probably 3-4 times per week. It is so calming and reassuring that I have a little miracle growing inside of me.
On St. Patrick's Day we decided to schedule an extra 3d/4d ultrasound and found out we are expecting our first daughter. She asked if I could tell what it was before she told us. I was hoping for a girl, but preparing myself for another boy. I said "boy?", she said, nope it's a little girl. I was shocked. "Really?, you said girl? I am having a girl?". I can't believe it. We wanted a girl so bad, but I didn't want to get my hopes up. I still have a small percent of me thinking that when I go in for our 20 week anatomy scan, that they will tell me my girl is now a boy and my dream will be crushed. But she said she hasn't been wrong in years and she checked multiple times throughout the ultrasound and at different angles, and she was 100% sure it was all girl!
We have thought about some names and have a few top runners. But, just like with Oliver, we will have a few picked out and constantly change 1 or 2 here and there, but eventually one will stand out and it will be for sure the name. Oliver and his little sister will be about 25 months apart and will be sharing a room. We only have 1 and a half more years left in MD, so we are just gonna stick it out in this 2bdr condo until we move.
Oliver is of course too young to understand, but we talk about his little sister all the time. I am hoping by the time she comes (due Aug 3o, 2011 by the way) he will get it, sort of.
So that is my great news that I just had to share.
Other than that...Shaun and I are doing great. Celebrating 3 year anniversary in May and taking a short 4 day Caribbean Cruise. Shaun is almost done with school and the ARMY. When he is done we are moving back to WA and never looking back. We, especially me, HATE Maryland and can't wait to get out.
Oliver is great too. He is 20 months and growing like a weed. He is so smart and learns things that I have no clue where they came from. He is 3 feet tall and only 28lbs, but just keeps growing. I bet he will be 6'4" by the time he stops growing. Wow! I can't believe my baby is almost 2 years old. Time sure flies by!